Escape from Windenburg | 9
I half-hoped Alejandro would forget I ever brought up magic - part of me regretted doing so, especially at a moment when my connection to it was so tenuous I could barely say it existed at all - but, of course, he didn't, and I could only come up with excuses to dodge his unrelenting questions for so long. Besides, maybe he could help me. Although he didn't seem to possess a drop of magical blood, his interest in the paranormal made him my best bet so far.
Still, my less trustworthy side tried to deflect him one last time. "Would you believe me if I told you I was only trying to get a rise out of you? And that I never knew anything about magic at all?"He snorted in disbelief. "Not even remotely. Come on, spill. You can trust me, I swear!"
"Well, I don't know as much as you want me to know," I said. "Like, I don't know how to do anything in that book, even though I've tried to understand it a million times."
"But you know how to do... other things?"
I reluctantly nodded - then immediately grimaced as I realized I shouldn't get his hopes up. I had to tell him the truth about my current predicament. "I used to. But I can't anymore. I don't know why. It's like all the potential for magic in me just suddenly drained away."
"Are you two losers talking about that made-up spooky shit again?" Rahul interjected, immediately dampening the impact of my reveal. "You know you're supposed to be helping, right? I can hardly shill gallons of fizzy drink to the masses on my own!"
"Dude, we were just getting into the juicy stuff!" Alejandro replied, aghast at the interruption.
But Rahul was right: this wasn't the time. The rest of my story would have to be saved for later. I couldn't risk coming across to the rest of the household like I was slacking off on my responsibilities, especially when I still had yet to sort out my own unique way of contributing.
Sid rubbed against my ankles, jealous now that he had to share my attention with six humans instead of hoarding it all for himself, and I was struck by an idea. I picked him up and slid into a prime position in front of the sales table. "Nobody can resist a cute pet," I said. "One glance at his whiskery little face and they'll be putty in our hands."
"I hope you're right," Lux grumbled. "We've been out here for hours and still have a ton of product to get rid of. I don't think we can cram one more bottle of this stuff into the fridge."
It could hardly be called a frenzy, but sales did seem to pick up, though I didn't have any concrete proof one way or another that it was Sid's doing. Still, the important part was that we ended the day in the green, even if just barely.
It became clear pretty quickly that when it came time to actually hawk their various wares, most of the household's members (the teenage ones, at least) were less than enthused at the prospect of taking part in such a simultaneously monotonous and energy-draining activity. They concocted various excuses to get out of it, and so I threw myself into the role of resident sales assistant with as much excitement as I could muster. If I couldn't rope Sid into being my mascot for the day, I would recruit Chiyo instead.
Enji's voice boomed out confidently as he drew potential customers in. "Come one, come all! You've been given the rare opportunity to snatch up a one-of-a-kind woodworking creation, made with skill and love by myself and my loyal apprentice! Get yours before they're gone for good!" Rahul rolled his eyes at his dad's over-the-top sales pitch. As a few people approached the table, Enji added hastily, "And today only, every buyer gets one free hug from this adorable and well-behaved dog!"
Within hours, we had sold all but one of his and Rahul's wooden sculptures. "You're a marketing genius!" he proclaimed. "That whole pet idea of yours is brilliant. I don't know why we didn't think of it sooner. Those puppy-dog eyes could sell people on anything!"
I was happy to finally be good at something, even if it wasn't exactly a skill that brought me great joy or fulfillment. In the moment, closing a sale filled me with a brief rush of adrenaline, and that was enough to carry me forward for the time being. Most importantly, I began to feel a sense of worth, that I might actually be capable of becoming a fully-realized person, even without magic. I was figuring out that, in life, there were often more small successes than big ones, and I was slowly learning how to appreciate them for what they were.
Weeks passed, and I settled contentedly into my new routines. I slept deeply every night, the weight of the day's work settled in my bones - but it was a tiredness that felt earned and so I didn't mind it.
It was a surprise then when one night I shot up in bed abruptly, feeling suddenly wide awake, though the pitch-black silence of the house told me I couldn't have been asleep for long. Even more strangely, I sensed a foreign energy radiating from behind me, a faint alien buzzing like something from another world overlapping with ours.
I crawled out of bed to investigate and was immediately met by a sight that seemed too bizarre to be real. The door to the bedroom Lux and I shared had been replaced by a shimmering, semi-transparent portal. When I peered into it, I saw no sign of the living room that should've been around the corner. Instead, there was only an endless black void.
I hesitated, unsure of my next move. But the longer I waited, the more I realized there was only one option. I couldn't get out of this room unless I stepped through the mysterious portal, even if I had no idea where - or even if - I would come out on the other side.
I took a deep breath, closed my eyes, and surrendered myself to the void, all while Lux slept unknowingly on.
I walked blindly forward until I thought I felt fresh air whipping my hair against my face. When I opened my eyes, I was in a place I recognized - sort of. I knew right away it was the Magic Realm but a part I'd never seen in my brief time there as a child, which had been spent safely cloistered on school grounds. Why was I here, and how? I squinted into the distance and thought I saw a figure there, waiting for me. My body pulled me toward it, even as my brain was still debating whether or not that was a good idea.
When I got near enough to make out the figure's features, I gasped. It couldn't be! It wasn't possible! But there was no denying what I saw. The figure was my mother, or her spirit anyway, just like I had seen so many times in my dreams. Was I dreaming now? I didn't think so. I felt grounded and clear-headed. My bare feet felt solid against the cold earth. "Mom?" I croaked, stepping as close to her as I dared. "Is it really you?"
"My dear Rowan." The sound of her voice sent a shiver up my spine and raised goosebumps across my entire body. My heart skipped a beat - or maybe even two. I didn't think I'd ever hear that low, comforting lilt of hers again, and it immediately erased all of my hesitation. I collapsed into her ghostly arms, which somehow gripped my shoulders in a way that felt startlingly real.
But I pulled away a moment later, my brain short-circuiting as it tried to make sense of it all. "Wait, how can I hear you right now? How did I even get here? Did you... send for me somehow? What's going on?"
"I've been trying to reach you for some time, but it's been so difficult to communicate. I'm caught somewhere in between the worlds of the living and the dead, incapable of fully inhabiting either. I was doing my best. I thought my messages were getting through. But then I lost you. You crossed a border, and I couldn't follow. Your sister's mind is closed off to me entirely. It's as though there's no spark of magic left in her at all."
Tears rolled from my eyes as I felt the weight of the last few months lifted from my shoulders, all that time spent wondering if I was crazy, if I was just concocting stories in my head because I couldn't bear the thought of letting her go. To know that I hadn't been wasting my time, that she had been asking for my help - the relief of finally knowing for sure was immeasurable.
"Mom, I failed!" I told her and began to explain everything in the gaps between my hiccuping sobs. "I tried so hard. I was teaching myself magic. I had nobody else. But Dad was going to take that away from me and I couldn't let him. So I ran, and I ran, and I ran, and I ran. I thought I could figure out how to bring you back and then we would go home together and he would finally understand. But then my magic disappeared. It just stopped working one day and I couldn't bring it back. So I'm sorry, I did everything I could, but it was all for nothing in the end."
"Oh, Rowan," she said softly. "That can't be true at all."
"Of course it's true!" I shouted in embarrassment and frustration. "I lost my magic! I'm useless! I can't do anything!"
"Yet you managed to bring us here together." I stared at her, mouth agape, uncomprehending, and she continued patiently. "I didn't summon you. If I had the power to achieve that, I would have done it a long time ago. I certainly tried. But, somehow, you found a way, all on your own. Your magic is strong. It's pulsing like a force field around you - bright, brilliant, beautiful."
"But I haven't been able to cast in months."
"Casting is as physical as it is mental. Your body must have needed to rest, bur your power kept building, quietly, in the background. But before you could harness it, you had to learn who you were without magic. Magic has its own consciousness, and it acts with purpose. Everything happens for a reason."
She must have sensed my lingering skepticism. "Go ahead," she said, gently nodding her head. "Try to cast."
I breathed evenly in and out, trying to center myself. I was terrified. Despite everything she had told me, I wasn't convinced it would work. What if none of this was real? What if it was just my unconscious mind laying the cruel groundwork for a nightmare in which my magic would fail me again? But I forced myself to follow through, forming my arms into gestures that still felt familiar, even though it had been so long. Slowly, a glimmering cloud of magical charge materialized before me - no black smoke this time, just pure, white light.
My charge built and built, until it was a blindingly bright globe too big to be contained within my palm. But I was still fully in control, I knew. Despite its size, my focus was precise and singular. That quivering illuminated sphere felt as much a part of myself as any organ in my body, my arms and legs, the blood running through my veins. It was my magic, revealing its full glory to me at last. But that hardly meant all was suddenly clear.
"What am I supposed to do now?" I asked. "Can't you just tell me how to get you back?"
"Each of us is on our own journey. You must follow the path that was destined for you, and the answers will reveal themselves in time. I have faith you'll find a way to bring us together again."
"But, Mom, I don't-"
"I love you, Rowan."
In an instant, I was back in the bottom bunk, Lux shaking my shoulder and urgently whispering my name. I was so startled that I flung back the sheets and practically lunged at her. She took a step back and I tumbled unceremoniously onto the floor instead. "Are you okay?" she asked. "I was worried. You were muttering all this weird shit under your breath that I couldn't make out."
I immediately scrambled to my feet and whipped around to face the doorway - but the door was just a door, made of wood, completely normal, opening out onto an entirely typical hall. There was nothing magical about it. But I knew what I had just experienced was no ordinary dream. My palms still burned with the residue of magical charge. I have to show the others, I thought. This was the epiphany I'd been waiting for.
"Show them what?" Lux asked from behind me, which made me realize I'd voiced my thought aloud.
"I have to show them," I repeated, barely registering her words, and marched determinedly out of the room.
Lux followed me, twitchy with concern. "Guys, I think something's wrong with Rowan," she blurted before I could seize their attention. "She's acting very strange."
"Nothing's wrong," I asserted, surprised by the newfound steeliness in my voice. "I've figured out my special ability. I thought I'd lost it, but it was here all along. I need to show you, now."
"It's a little early for your melodrama, isn't it?" Rav muttered, which I thought was rich coming from her, but I bit my tongue.
"I need you all to come out on the porch," I insisted instead. "It's important you witness this with your own eyes."
I could tell everyone was only humoring me as they grudgingly dragged themselves outside. They had no idea what I was about to reveal. I didn't want to scare them, so I had decided to start small. Instead of making a spectacle, I would show them that magic could be useful. "I need some sort of object," I told them. "Something simple. Maybe one of your sculptures, Enji?"
"Well, um, sure," he muttered, trying and failing to wrap his head around the reason for my request. "I just finished one up. It's still over there on my workbench. But, Rowan, why don't you just slow down and..."
His voice trailed off as he watched me run over to the work bench and place the painstakingly-whittled horse figurine on the ground. Then, with no hesitation, for I could feel the charge flowing smoothly through my body, once more a well-oiled magic machine, I began to cast.
Seconds later, as they looked on in stunned silence, a second horse, identical down to every last detail, appeared alongside the original. The spell had worked like a charm.
It took a few moments that seemed to stretch on eternally for them to react, their faces revealing varying states of emotion - shock, horror, stupefaction, disbelief. For the longest time, no one said a word. Their eyes just kept darting between me, the two horses, and each other, as if caught in an endless loop.
Finally, Aarti spoke. "That is quite some talent," she said, scratching her head quizzically as her gaze remained glued to the suddenly twinned carvings. "I can't say I've ever seen anything like it before. It'll take some getting used to, that's for sure. How on earth did you learn to do that?"
"You told me you couldn't do that anymore," Alejandro said, finding his voice again. "Have you been holding out on me?"
"No! I wasn't lying, I promise. I only just got my abilities back. If you would have asked me to do that yesterday, I'm not sure I would've been able to."
"Well, what's changed between now and then?"
I bit down on my lip, my head spinning as I tried to decide where to start. "It's a long story," I said finally. Everyone stared back at me expectantly. Suddenly, I had a whole lot of explaining to do.
By the end of that day, I felt reborn, like I was finally shedding the last remnants of the shy, hesitant girl I had once been and emerging as the confident and headstrong young woman I'd always hoped to become. I knew I needed to tangibly mark this transition, make some sort of physical change that would show the whole world how much I had grown. In the end, I asked Aarti if she would do the honor of cutting my hair.
"Are you sure about this?" she asked, brandishing a massive pair of kitchen shears mere inches away from my thick, tangled mane of curls.
"Take it all off," I said, feeling fully certain I was making the right decision for perhaps the first time in my life.