Road to Selvadorada II
Previously: After a series of upsetting cat deaths, Aisha and Shawn dropped everything and set out for the deepest, most dangerous parts of the Selvadoradian jungle in pursuit of Shawn's heretofore unknown dream of becoming a world-renowned archaeologist.
Aisha: Wow, babe, you really weren't kidding about the view. I know I've been second-guessing this trip all day, but I'm officially impressed.
She's even inspired enough to finally do something useful by picking a few of these strange-looking fruits. When eaten, they appear to have a significant effect on mood. Fascinating...
Wow, this is truly a magnificent sight to behold.
You can even see their vacation home way down below!
Of course, Aisha and Shawn can't leave the jungle without first blessing it with their lovemaking. To be honest, I'm surprised it took them this long.
Shawn: Well, that may be the most exhilarating thing I've ever experienced!
Fuck! Is this some sort of karmic revenge on the part of the jungle in retaliation for Aisha and Shawn daring to disrespect its sacred ground? Unfortunately, none of the vendors were ever selling machetes, so this is the only one they've got. I guess this trip is going to have to come to an end sooner than I thought, at least the jungle adventure part of it.
But, first, they did manage to discover the legendary Omiscan Royal Baths! There's no way they can leave without checking those out first.
Aisha: Wow, it's so beautiful here.
Shawn: It really is. Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Aisha: If what you're thinking starts with "skinny" and ends with "dipping," then, yes. Yes, I am.
Listen, if anything, they're showing respect by getting naked! I doubt the Omiscans allowed themselves to be encumbered by clothes when they swam in these baths so many thousands of years ago.
I'm sorry, but I just can't get enough of these views!
Aisha: Okay, I'm sold. We definitely have to come back soon and see this journey through to the end.
(On an entirely shallow note, damnnnnnnn, girl, that ass!)
As much as they ended up appreciating the jungle's wild but strangely serene beauty, both Aisha and Shawn are pretty relieved to be back in civilized society where there's real food and real showers.
The locals were pretty eager to hear Shawn's stories of adventure, so he may have embellished a detail or two to make their time in the jungle sound more thrilling than it actually was.
Aisha: Spirit of Madre Cosecha, please protect us with your blessing for the rest of our time here.
Oh, geez, that's, um... quite the blessing Aisha's carrying around there. I didn't really plan this, but the mystical fertility powers of the jungle woohoo bush must've been too powerful to avoid.
Aisha: Honey, you'll never guess the good news I just discovered... I'm pregnant!
Shawn: Oh, wow! You know, I was going to say to hell with the machete and whatever happens out there happens, but this changes everything! I couldn't possibly put our child in harm's way!
(Yet you're totally willing to put your wife in harm's way... Okay, I see how it is.)
Aisha: *throws up a little in her mouth* I'm so sorry, ma'am. I promise I'm not vomiting at the sight of your cuisine. In fact, it looks delicious! I just happen to be very much in the throes of morning sickness right now.
Of course, she's not going to let her present condition stop her from dancing! They might still look ridiculous to the locals, but I think Shawn and Aisha are picking up those rumbasim moves pretty well!
Oh my gosh!!!!! I know they're supposed to be cat people, but this stray dog just chilling in the middle of the square is totally vying for my heart right now.
Aisha: Whoa, I'm not sure about this at all! It's so big... and loud... and BIG!
Well, I hate to break it to you, Aisha, but I think you've been officially overruled! How can you deny the cuteness of these cuddles?!?
Shawn: Honey, I have never wanted to adopt a creature more.
Aisha: B-b-but... There's an adorable stray cat right there! Why can't we take it home?
Aisha: Ugh, fine, you go ahead and bond with your stupid new dog. Just don't expect me to have any part in it!
By the way, her name is Dakota. That's probably an important thing to mention.
Despite her misgivings, Aisha loves Shawn enough to give Dakota a try, even if she is a gross dog.
Aisha: But you definitely need to give her a bath before I even think about touching her.
Here's Aisha pretending she knows how to read the water like an old pro, but she really has no idea what she's doing. This murky lagoon is nothing like the clean, clear ponds back home.
Regardless, she manages to catch this fish that's nearly as big as she is. They'll be feasting upon that thing for days!
Back at the vacation home, Aisha and Shawn spend their last night in Selvadorada around the fire pit with their favorite company in the world: each other.
Aisha: Damn it, my marshmallow doesn't deserve such a fiery fate!!!
Upon returning to Brindleton Bay, Aisha is hit with the sad truth that half of her cats are now dead all over again. Those hormonal mood swings from her pregnancy aren't helping any either.
Meanwhile, Shawn is neck-deep in artifact authentication and loving every second of it.
Look at that beautifully preserved sword! Several of his finds turned out to be cleverly-crafted fakes, but he also discovered enough real artifacts to make him eager to go back and dig up some more.
I can't believe it! Aisha and Dakota are actually bonding! She may have room for a dog in her cat-crazy heart after all.
Her attention soon returns to her feline friends, though, as Yogi is sick and has to receive a painful shot from the vet. Aisha can hardly stand to watch.
Soon, Aisha is experiencing the first pains of labor, and although they're on opposite ends of the pet spectrum, Nutmeg and Dakota share a brief moment of camaraderie in having no idea what the hell is going on.
To be fair, I don't think Shawn has much more of an idea, and he's human. Aisha does not look confident in his abilities to calmly coach her through delivery.
Receptionist: Hey, I know you! Didn't we almost date back when we were kids?
Aisha: "Almost date" is a very generous way of putting it. As I remember, you were a complete wet blanket. Now get me into a room already. I'm having a baby here!
Meanwhile, Shawn can't handle the pressure and has no choice but to succumb to a stress nap on the waiting room sofa.
Aisha: Excuse me, sir, what do you think you're doing?!? Put that back inside me this instant!!!
In the end, she's presented with a bouncing baby boy named Gideon!
Now that she's no longer pregnant, it's time to sweat away those lingering pounds with an intense round of yoga.
She looks a little uncertain after so long away from her yoga mat, but I think she's doing great!
Okay, maybe there are a few kinks to be worked out, but she'll be back on form in no time.
Aisha: Wow, babe, you really weren't kidding about the view. I know I've been second-guessing this trip all day, but I'm officially impressed.
She's even inspired enough to finally do something useful by picking a few of these strange-looking fruits. When eaten, they appear to have a significant effect on mood. Fascinating...
Wow, this is truly a magnificent sight to behold.
You can even see their vacation home way down below!
Of course, Aisha and Shawn can't leave the jungle without first blessing it with their lovemaking. To be honest, I'm surprised it took them this long.
Shawn: Well, that may be the most exhilarating thing I've ever experienced!
Fuck! Is this some sort of karmic revenge on the part of the jungle in retaliation for Aisha and Shawn daring to disrespect its sacred ground? Unfortunately, none of the vendors were ever selling machetes, so this is the only one they've got. I guess this trip is going to have to come to an end sooner than I thought, at least the jungle adventure part of it.
But, first, they did manage to discover the legendary Omiscan Royal Baths! There's no way they can leave without checking those out first.
Aisha: Wow, it's so beautiful here.
Shawn: It really is. Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Aisha: If what you're thinking starts with "skinny" and ends with "dipping," then, yes. Yes, I am.
Listen, if anything, they're showing respect by getting naked! I doubt the Omiscans allowed themselves to be encumbered by clothes when they swam in these baths so many thousands of years ago.
I'm sorry, but I just can't get enough of these views!
Aisha: Okay, I'm sold. We definitely have to come back soon and see this journey through to the end.
(On an entirely shallow note, damnnnnnnn, girl, that ass!)
As much as they ended up appreciating the jungle's wild but strangely serene beauty, both Aisha and Shawn are pretty relieved to be back in civilized society where there's real food and real showers.
The locals were pretty eager to hear Shawn's stories of adventure, so he may have embellished a detail or two to make their time in the jungle sound more thrilling than it actually was.
Aisha: Spirit of Madre Cosecha, please protect us with your blessing for the rest of our time here.
Oh, geez, that's, um... quite the blessing Aisha's carrying around there. I didn't really plan this, but the mystical fertility powers of the jungle woohoo bush must've been too powerful to avoid.
Aisha: Honey, you'll never guess the good news I just discovered... I'm pregnant!
Shawn: Oh, wow! You know, I was going to say to hell with the machete and whatever happens out there happens, but this changes everything! I couldn't possibly put our child in harm's way!
(Yet you're totally willing to put your wife in harm's way... Okay, I see how it is.)
Aisha: *throws up a little in her mouth* I'm so sorry, ma'am. I promise I'm not vomiting at the sight of your cuisine. In fact, it looks delicious! I just happen to be very much in the throes of morning sickness right now.
Of course, she's not going to let her present condition stop her from dancing! They might still look ridiculous to the locals, but I think Shawn and Aisha are picking up those rumbasim moves pretty well!
Oh my gosh!!!!! I know they're supposed to be cat people, but this stray dog just chilling in the middle of the square is totally vying for my heart right now.
Aisha: Whoa, I'm not sure about this at all! It's so big... and loud... and BIG!
Well, I hate to break it to you, Aisha, but I think you've been officially overruled! How can you deny the cuteness of these cuddles?!?
Shawn: Honey, I have never wanted to adopt a creature more.
Aisha: B-b-but... There's an adorable stray cat right there! Why can't we take it home?
Aisha: Ugh, fine, you go ahead and bond with your stupid new dog. Just don't expect me to have any part in it!
By the way, her name is Dakota. That's probably an important thing to mention.
Despite her misgivings, Aisha loves Shawn enough to give Dakota a try, even if she is a gross dog.
Aisha: But you definitely need to give her a bath before I even think about touching her.
Here's Aisha pretending she knows how to read the water like an old pro, but she really has no idea what she's doing. This murky lagoon is nothing like the clean, clear ponds back home.
Regardless, she manages to catch this fish that's nearly as big as she is. They'll be feasting upon that thing for days!
Back at the vacation home, Aisha and Shawn spend their last night in Selvadorada around the fire pit with their favorite company in the world: each other.
Aisha: Damn it, my marshmallow doesn't deserve such a fiery fate!!!
Upon returning to Brindleton Bay, Aisha is hit with the sad truth that half of her cats are now dead all over again. Those hormonal mood swings from her pregnancy aren't helping any either.
Meanwhile, Shawn is neck-deep in artifact authentication and loving every second of it.
Look at that beautifully preserved sword! Several of his finds turned out to be cleverly-crafted fakes, but he also discovered enough real artifacts to make him eager to go back and dig up some more.
I can't believe it! Aisha and Dakota are actually bonding! She may have room for a dog in her cat-crazy heart after all.
Her attention soon returns to her feline friends, though, as Yogi is sick and has to receive a painful shot from the vet. Aisha can hardly stand to watch.
Soon, Aisha is experiencing the first pains of labor, and although they're on opposite ends of the pet spectrum, Nutmeg and Dakota share a brief moment of camaraderie in having no idea what the hell is going on.
To be fair, I don't think Shawn has much more of an idea, and he's human. Aisha does not look confident in his abilities to calmly coach her through delivery.
Receptionist: Hey, I know you! Didn't we almost date back when we were kids?
Aisha: "Almost date" is a very generous way of putting it. As I remember, you were a complete wet blanket. Now get me into a room already. I'm having a baby here!
Meanwhile, Shawn can't handle the pressure and has no choice but to succumb to a stress nap on the waiting room sofa.
Aisha: Excuse me, sir, what do you think you're doing?!? Put that back inside me this instant!!!
In the end, she's presented with a bouncing baby boy named Gideon!
Now that she's no longer pregnant, it's time to sweat away those lingering pounds with an intense round of yoga.
She looks a little uncertain after so long away from her yoga mat, but I think she's doing great!
Okay, maybe there are a few kinks to be worked out, but she'll be back on form in no time.